From Dragonborn to Husband/Wife: A Comprehensive Guide to Getting Married in Skyrim

So, you’ve slain dragons, shouted down mountains, and become the hero of Skyrim. But have you found true love? Marriage in Skyrim isn’t just a role-playing choice; it’s a way to gain a valuable in-game companion, a shared home, and a steady income. This guide will walk you through every step of the process, from finding the perfect partner to saying “I do” at the Temple of Mara.

## Why Get Married in Skyrim?

Before diving into the how-to, let’s explore the benefits of tying the knot in Tamriel:

* **Companion:** Your spouse will become a follower, aiding you in combat and carrying your burdens. They are generally skilled in combat and can make a real difference in tough fights.
* **Shared Home:** You can live in your spouse’s home or one that you own (such as Breezehome in Whiterun or a house you build through the Hearthfire DLC). This provides a safe place to store items, sleep, and relax.
* **Spousal Benefits:** Once a day, your spouse will cook you a home-cooked meal, which grants a temporary buff to health, magicka, and stamina regeneration. They’ll also give you a cut of the profits from their shop (approximately 100 gold per day).
* **Role-Playing:** Marriage adds another layer of depth to your Skyrim experience, allowing you to explore your character’s personal relationships and build a life beyond adventuring.
* **Achievement/Trophy:** If you are playing on a console, marrying someone will unlock the “Married” achievement/trophy.

## Prerequisites: The Amulet of Mara

The most crucial item for getting married in Skyrim is the Amulet of Mara. This amulet signifies your availability for marriage and allows potential partners to recognize your romantic intentions.

### How to Obtain the Amulet of Mara:

* **Purchase from Maramal in Riften:** The easiest way to acquire the Amulet of Mara is to purchase it from Maramal, a priest of Mara, in Riften. You’ll usually find him in the Bee and Barb tavern or the Temple of Mara. He sells the amulet for 200 gold. This is by far the most straightforward method.
* **Complete the “The Book of Love” Quest:** Alternatively, you can obtain the amulet by completing the quest “The Book of Love,” also given by Maramal. This quest involves traveling to various locations and helping couples in need, showcasing Mara’s influence of love and compassion. Completing the quest will reward you with the amulet, free of charge. If you are short on gold, then this might be the best method.

### Starting “The Book of Love” Quest:

1. **Travel to Riften:** Head to Riften, located in the southeastern corner of Skyrim.
2. **Find the Temple of Mara:** The Temple of Mara is located prominently within the city. Ask guards for directions if you have trouble finding it.
3. **Speak to Maramal:** Maramal is usually found inside the Temple of Mara. Talk to him about Mara and marriage.
4. **Accept the Quest:** He will offer you the quest “The Book of Love.”

### Completing “The Book of Love” Quest:

This quest involves several smaller tasks, each requiring you to help a couple in need of Mara’s guidance:

1. **Slay the Draugr for Calcelmo and Faleen in Markarth:** Travel to Markarth and find Calcelmo in Understone Keep. Speak to him, and he will tell you about his unrequited love for Faleen. Head to Faleen, who is usually found near the Silver-Blood Inn. She tells you that Calcelmo’s rival is dead and you will have to check if the rival is truly dead. Then, go to Nchuand-Zel and clear all the Draugr in the first part of the ruin. Return to Faleen and tell her about Calcelmo’s feelings and that his rival is dead. Return to Maramal for the next part of the quest.
2. **Reunite Bothela and Anders in Windhelm:** Head to Windhelm and find Bothela working in the Gray Quarter. Speak to her and she will tell you that she is in love with Anders and will give you an amulet of Arkay to take to him. Find Anders and tell him about Bothela’s feelings. He is afraid to be with Bothela because he thinks his past will stop them from being together. Tell him to be with her and he will return to Bothela. Return to Maramal for the next part of the quest.
3. **Help Ruki and Fenrig in Ivarstead:** Go to Ivarstead and find Ruki. Speak to Ruki. She will tell you that she loves Fenrig but Fenrig will not return her love. Speak to Fenrig and he will tell you he wants to leave Ivarstead to become a pilgrim. Tell him that Ruki loves him. Then he will return to Ruki. Return to Maramal for the next part of the quest.
4. **Return to Maramal:** After completing all the tasks, return to Maramal in Riften. He will thank you for your service to Mara and reward you with the Amulet of Mara.

## Finding a Suitable Spouse

With the Amulet of Mara equipped, you can now begin your search for a spouse. Not all NPCs in Skyrim are marriageable, and each has specific requirements that must be met before they’ll accept your proposal. Here’s a breakdown of how to identify and woo potential partners:

### Identifying Marriage Candidates:

* **Equip the Amulet of Mara:** This is essential! NPCs who are open to marriage will have a unique dialogue option when you speak to them while wearing the amulet. The dialogue option will be something along the lines of “Are you interested in me?”
* **Look for NPCs with Disposition:** Most marriage candidates have a disposition towards the player. This means they are friendly and helpful. You can often increase an NPC’s disposition by completing quests for them or performing acts of kindness.
* **Consider Location:** Marriage candidates can be found all over Skyrim, in cities, towns, and even remote settlements. Explore different areas to discover potential partners.
* **Check the Wiki:** The Elder Scrolls Wiki is a comprehensive resource for all things Skyrim. It has a list of all marriageable NPCs, along with their locations, requirements, and other relevant information.

### Requirements for Marriage:

Each marriage candidate has specific requirements that must be met before they will agree to marry you. These requirements typically involve completing a quest for them or otherwise improving their disposition towards you. Some common requirements include:

* **Completing a Favor:** Many marriage candidates will require you to complete a favor for them, such as retrieving a lost item, delivering a message, or clearing out a dungeon.
* **Completing a Questline:** Some marriage candidates are only available after you complete a specific questline. For example, you can only marry certain members of the Companions after completing their main questline.
* **Becoming Thane:** In some cases, you may need to become Thane of a particular hold to marry a resident of that hold. This usually involves completing quests for the Jarl and assisting the citizens of the hold.

### Notable Marriage Candidates:

Here are a few popular and easily accessible marriage candidates, along with their locations and requirements:

* **Aela the Huntress (Whiterun):** A skilled archer and member of the Companions. Requirement: Complete the Companions questline.
* **Lydia (Whiterun):** Your first housecarl, assigned to you after becoming Thane of Whiterun. Requirement: Become Thane of Whiterun.
* **Mjoll the Lioness (Riften):** A strong warrior who roams Riften with her follower, Aerin. Requirement: Retrieve her sword, Grimsever, from a nearby Dwemer ruin.
* **Ysolda (Whiterun):** A resourceful merchant in Whiterun. Requirement: Bring her a Mammoth Tusk.
* **Camilla Valerius (Riverwood):** A shopkeeper in Riverwood, caught in a love triangle. Requirement: Complete the quest “The Golden Claw” for Lucan Valerius (her brother).
* **Brelyna Maryon (College of Winterhold):** An apprentice mage at the College of Winterhold. Requirement: Complete her personal quest where you help her practice her Conjuration spells.

### The Courtship:

Once you’ve identified a potential spouse and met their requirements, it’s time to pop the question. With the Amulet of Mara equipped, speak to the NPC. If they are interested, they will respond positively and express their feelings for you. They will accept your marriage proposal.

## The Wedding Ceremony

After your proposal is accepted, your future spouse will tell you to meet them at the Temple of Mara in Riften. Head there and speak to Maramal. He will confirm your upcoming wedding and ask you to wait until the next day for the ceremony to take place.

### The Wedding Day:

* **Be on Time:** Arrive at the Temple of Mara in Riften before the scheduled time. The ceremony will begin shortly after dawn.
* **Speak to Maramal:** Talk to Maramal to let him know you’re ready to proceed.
* **Witnesses:** Other NPCs from around Skyrim, especially ones that you have helped, will attend the wedding.
* **Enjoy the Ceremony:** Maramal will perform the ceremony, reciting vows and blessing your union.
* **The Vows:** You don’t get to say any personalized vows, unfortunately. Maramal will do all the talking.

### Post-Wedding:

After the ceremony, your spouse will officially become your companion. You’ll have the opportunity to decide where you want to live. You can choose to live in your spouse’s home, one of your own properties, or purchase a new home together.

## Choosing a Home

The choice of where to live is important, as it will affect your daily life and the benefits you receive from your spouse. Consider the following factors when making your decision:

* **Location:** Choose a location that is convenient for your adventuring style. A home in a major city like Whiterun or Riften will provide easy access to shops, trainers, and quests.
* **Amenities:** Consider the amenities offered by each home, such as crafting stations, storage space, and a comfortable bed.
* **Personal Preference:** Ultimately, the best home is the one that you find most appealing. Choose a home that you enjoy spending time in and that reflects your character’s personality.

### Available Homes:

* **Your Spouse’s Home:** Many marriage candidates already own a home that you can move into after the wedding. This is often the simplest option, as it requires no additional investment.
* **Player-Owned Homes:** You can purchase and furnish various homes throughout Skyrim. Some popular options include:
* **Breezehome (Whiterun):** The first home most players acquire, conveniently located near the center of Whiterun.
* **Hjerim (Windhelm):** A large and luxurious home in Windhelm, but it requires completing a rather dark quest to be available.
* **Honeyside (Riften):** A cozy home in Riften, located near the marketplace and the Thieves Guild.
* **Proudspire Manor (Solitude):** An expensive but elegant home in Solitude, offering stunning views of the city.
* **Vlindrel Hall (Markarth):** A Dwemer-inspired home in Markarth, known for its unique architecture.
* **Hearthfire Homes:** With the Hearthfire DLC, you can build your own custom home from the ground up. This allows for maximum customization and control over your living space.

## Life After Marriage

Marriage in Skyrim is more than just a one-time event; it’s an ongoing relationship that offers various benefits and challenges.

### Daily Life:

* **Spousal Interactions:** Talk to your spouse regularly to maintain a positive relationship. They will offer you gifts, cook meals, and provide you with a share of their profits.
* **Home Life:** Spend time at home to relax and recharge. Your spouse will keep the home tidy and provide a comfortable living environment.
* **Adventuring Together:** Bring your spouse along on your adventures. They will provide valuable support in combat and carry your burdens.

### Potential Issues:

* **Spouse Kidnapping:** In rare cases, your spouse may be kidnapped by bandits or other enemies. You’ll need to rescue them to ensure their safety.
* **Spouse Death:** While rare, your spouse can die in combat. Be careful when bringing them along on dangerous adventures. If your spouse does die, you are able to marry another NPC.
* **Divorce:** There is no way to divorce your spouse in the vanilla version of Skyrim. Mods are required to achieve divorce.

## Tips and Tricks for a Happy Marriage

* **Choose Wisely:** Don’t rush into marriage. Take the time to get to know potential spouses and choose someone who complements your character’s personality and playstyle.
* **Be Generous:** Give your spouse gifts to show your affection. Flowers, jewelry, and other small tokens of appreciation will go a long way.
* **Protect Your Spouse:** Prioritize your spouse’s safety in combat. Equip them with strong armor and weapons, and keep them out of harm’s way.
* **Communicate Regularly:** Talk to your spouse often to maintain a positive relationship. Listen to their concerns and offer them support.
* **Consider a Mod:** Several mods can enhance the marriage experience in Skyrim, adding new dialogue options, quests, and features. If you’re looking for a more immersive and realistic marriage, consider exploring these mods.

## Marriage Mods

For players seeking a more in-depth and customizable marriage experience, several mods are available on platforms like the Nexus Mods website. Here are a few popular options:

* **Relationship Dialogue Overhaul (RDO):** This mod adds hundreds of new dialogue lines for NPCs, including spouses, making conversations more realistic and engaging.
* **Marriage Mod – To Have And To Hold:** This mod overhauls the marriage system, adding new features such as wedding ceremonies, anniversary celebrations, and the ability to have children (if you also have a child mod installed).
* **My Home Is Your Home:** Allows your spouse (and other followers) to move into any player home, even ones not officially recognized by the game. This gives you greater freedom in choosing where to live.
* **Spouses Can Live Everywhere:** A simple mod that removes the restrictions on where your spouse can live, allowing them to follow you to any location in the game.

## Conclusion

Marriage in Skyrim is a rewarding experience that adds depth and complexity to your character’s life. By following this guide, you can find the perfect partner, build a happy home, and enjoy the many benefits of marital bliss. So, equip your Amulet of Mara, venture forth into the wilds of Skyrim, and find your true love! Good luck, Dragonborn, and may your marriage be filled with joy, adventure, and plenty of sweetrolls.