Mastering the Art of Subtle: How to Not Look High (Even When You Are)

Let’s face it, sometimes life throws curveballs, and sometimes those curveballs involve altered states of consciousness. Whether you’ve indulged a little, are dealing with the side effects of medication, or are simply feeling a bit out of it, there are situations where you might want to appear more composed than you actually feel. This guide is your comprehensive resource for navigating those moments with grace and subtle mastery. We’re not here to judge your choices, but rather to provide practical, detailed strategies to help you maintain a collected demeanor when you need to.

This isn’t about encouraging dishonesty or masking personal struggles. Instead, it’s about equipping you with the tools to navigate social situations and maintain professionalism when being ‘high’ is not the desired vibe. This guide will delve into various aspects of your appearance, behavior, and communication, offering actionable steps you can implement. Remember, responsibility and moderation are key, and this information is presented for those specific circumstances where appearing sober is necessary.

Understanding the Tell-Tale Signs

Before we dive into the solutions, it’s important to understand the common signs people associate with being high. These can vary depending on the substance and individual, but here are some of the most frequent indicators:

• Red Eyes: Bloodshot eyes are often the most obvious giveaway due to dilated blood vessels.
• Dilated Pupils: Pupil size can be affected by various substances. Large pupils in bright lighting are a noticeable sign.
• Dry Mouth (Cottonmouth): This can lead to frequent lip licking or requests for water.
• Slowed or Slurred Speech: Words might come out slower than usual, or speech might become unclear.
• Impaired Coordination: Difficulty with balance, clumsiness, or shaky hands can be telling.
• Altered Affect: Excessive giggling, unusual calmness, or a flat affect can indicate altered states.
• Changes in Behavior: This can include increased chattiness, paranoia, forgetfulness, or difficulty concentrating.

Recognizing these signs is the first step towards mitigating them. Now, let’s get into the nitty-gritty of how to counteract them.

The Eyes Have It: Combating Redness and Dilation

1. Eye Drops: Your Secret Weapon

The single most effective way to tackle red eyes is with lubricating eye drops designed for redness relief. These drops constrict the blood vessels in your eyes, restoring a clear, white appearance. Here’s how to use them effectively:

1. Choose the Right Drops: Opt for drops specifically designed to reduce redness, rather than just general lubricating drops. Look for products containing naphazoline hydrochloride or tetrahydrozoline hydrochloride.
2. Wash Your Hands: Before touching your eyes, wash your hands thoroughly to prevent infection.
3. Tilt Your Head Back: Gently tilt your head back and pull down your lower eyelid to create a small pocket.
4. Apply One Drop: Squeeze a single drop into the pocket you created. Avoid overusing eye drops, as they can cause rebound redness with excessive use.
5. Close Your Eyes: Gently close your eyes and blink a few times to distribute the solution.
6. Wipe Away Excess: If any excess liquid drips onto your face, wipe it away with a clean tissue.
7. Reapply as Needed: The effects of eye drops usually last a few hours, so reapply as needed, but avoid overuse.

Important Considerations:

• Carry Them With You: Keep a small bottle of eye drops in your bag or pocket for easy access.
• Don’t Share Drops: Sharing eye drops can spread infections.
• Read the Label: Be sure to read the product label for any contraindications or warnings.

2. Sunglasses: The Classic Cover-Up

Sunglasses can be a godsend if your eyes are red or your pupils are dilated. They offer a quick and easy way to conceal these signs. Here’s how to make the most of this strategy:

• Choose a Versatile Style: Opt for a style that doesn’t draw too much attention to itself, like classic wayfarers or aviators.
• Consider the Setting: Wearing sunglasses indoors or at night might seem suspicious, so use them judiciously. They are ideal for outdoor settings or on the way to your destination.
• Use Them Wisely: Don’t keep your sunglasses on for extended periods if the lighting doesn’t justify it. This could make you appear more suspicious. Take them off when you’re in more suitable environments.

3. Light Exposure: Natural Pupil Control

While dilated pupils are harder to control than redness, exposure to bright light can help to constrict them slightly. If you have some time before you need to appear sober, try to be in well-lit environments. This will help your pupils respond more naturally.

Hydration and Oral Hygiene: Addressing Dry Mouth and Breath

1. Stay Hydrated: The Foundation of Freshness

Dry mouth, often referred to as ‘cottonmouth’, can lead to frequent lip licking or requests for water, which are both obvious signs. Maintaining hydration is crucial:

• Drink Water Regularly: Carry a water bottle and sip on water frequently throughout the day.
• Avoid Sugary Drinks: Sugary drinks can dehydrate you further. Stick to water, herbal teas, or sugar-free beverages.
• Eat Hydrating Foods: Fruits and vegetables with high water content, like watermelon, cucumbers, and celery, can also help combat dry mouth.

2. Gum and Mints: Masking Unpleasant Breath

Substances can affect your breath. Keep chewing gum or mints with you to keep your breath fresh. Choose sugar-free options to further promote oral health.

Tips:

• Opt for Strong Mints: Use mints that are very strong, not fruity flavors that will not address bad breath.
• Avoid Talking With Gum: While chewing gum is effective, avoid speaking while actively chewing. Speak between chomps.

3. Oral Hygiene: A Thorough Approach

While breath mints provide temporary relief, maintaining good oral hygiene is important:

• Brush Your Teeth: Brush your teeth as soon as possible after using any substances. Use a fluoride-based toothpaste.
• Use Mouthwash: A mouthwash with an antiseptic can help kill odor-causing bacteria in your mouth.
• Consider a Tongue Scraper: A tongue scraper will help remove bacteria that can contribute to bad breath.

Speech and Coordination: Maintaining Control

1. Practice Mindfulness and Conscious Speech

Mindful speech involves paying attention to how you’re speaking. To maintain control:

• Slow Down: Consciously slow down your rate of speech. Take pauses between words and sentences.
• Enunciate Clearly: Focus on pronouncing each word clearly. Avoid mumbling or slurring.
• Think Before You Speak: Take a moment to gather your thoughts before you speak. This prevents rambling.
• Avoid Speaking Too Much: Resist the urge to over-explain or become excessively talkative. Keep conversations concise.

2. Movement and Coordination: Controlled Grace

Impaired coordination can be a dead giveaway, so focus on maintaining deliberate, controlled movements:

• Move Slowly and Deliberately: Avoid sudden, jerky movements. Walk with a controlled pace and be mindful of your steps.
• Avoid Rushing: Rushing can increase the likelihood of clumsiness. Give yourself ample time to do things.
• Sit Upright: Maintain good posture and avoid slumping or fidgeting. This can convey confidence and stability.
• Be Conscious of Your Hands: Avoid shaky hands or fidgety movements. Place your hands on a table or in your lap when possible.

3. Practice Simple Motor Skills

If you have time to prepare, engage in activities that require coordination:

• Practice Walking: Walk in a straight line to practice your balance and coordination.
• Use Your Hands: Engage in a task that needs fine motor control such as writing or picking up small objects.

Behavior and Demeanor: Projecting Composure

1. Act Normal and Engaged

One of the best ways to appear sober is to act as you would normally:

• Engage in Conversations: Participate in conversations, but don’t be overly enthusiastic or quiet.
• Make Eye Contact: Maintain appropriate eye contact. Don’t stare, but don’t avoid it either.
• Show Interest: Ask questions and actively listen to others.
• Avoid Over-Sharing: Don’t reveal too much personal information or act inappropriately.

2. Maintain a Calm Demeanor

Stay calm and avoid emotional extremes:

• Control your Emotions: Avoid outbursts of laughter, anger, or sadness.
• Practice Relaxation Techniques: If you feel anxious, take a few deep breaths to calm yourself.
• Avoid Heated Discussions: Try to steer clear of any controversial or emotionally charged topics.
• Be Observant: Pay attention to the environment and the people around you.

3. Be Aware of Social Cues

Pay attention to the social cues around you. Mirror the body language and the behavior of those around you. This will help you blend in seamlessly:

• Observe Others: Pay attention to the body language and mannerisms of the people around you.
• Match the Tone: Try to match your tone of voice and speaking style to the people you’re interacting with.
• Avoid Standing Out: Try not to draw attention to yourself unnecessarily.

The Power of Preparation

1. Plan Ahead

If you know you’ll be in a situation where you need to be sober, plan in advance:

• Know Your Limits: Be mindful of your limits when consuming substances.
• Allow Enough Time: Give yourself ample time to sober up before you need to be in a situation.
• Have an Escape Route: Have a plan in place if you need to leave a situation.
• Inform a Trusted Friend: If possible, have a trusted friend who can help you if needed.

2. Kit of Essentials

Create a small kit of essentials you can take with you:

• Eye Drops: For reducing redness in your eyes.
• Mints or Gum: For freshening breath.
• Water Bottle: To stay hydrated.
• Hand Sanitizer: To maintain hygiene.

3. Practice Your Strategies

Practice these techniques in a safe and private environment. The more you practice, the more natural they’ll become. This can help you when you need to implement them in a more important situation:

• Practice Mindfulness: Practice being present and aware of your thoughts and actions.
• Practice Speech: Speak slowly and clearly.
• Practice Your Movement: Practice controlled and deliberate movements.

Final Thoughts

Mastering the art of appearing sober when you’re not is all about being mindful and strategic. By addressing the tell-tale signs and using these techniques, you can navigate those situations discreetly. Remember that responsible behavior and moderation are important. This guide is to empower you with practical tools for specific situations. This isn’t about deception, but rather about empowering you to navigate life’s curveballs with confidence. If you are struggling with drug abuse, please seek professional help.

With practice and preparation, you can confidently control your appearance and behavior. Be discreet and conscious of your actions and you will achieve your goal.