Running Away: A Teenager’s Guide to Safety and Survival (and Why You Should Reconsider)

Running away from home is a huge decision, often made in moments of intense emotion or perceived hopelessness. While this guide aims to provide information on how to survive if you choose to run, it is crucially important to understand that running away is rarely the best solution and comes with significant risks. Before even considering the steps outlined below, please explore every possible avenue to resolve the issues you’re facing at home. Talk to a trusted adult, a school counselor, or a family friend. There are resources available to help you navigate difficult situations.

This article is structured into two main sections: Why You Should Reconsider and If You Still Choose to Run: A Survival Guide. The first section aims to highlight the dangers and alternative solutions, while the second provides practical advice for survival only if you’ve exhausted all other options and made the difficult decision to leave.

Why You Should Reconsider Running Away

Running away might seem like a quick fix, but it often leads to more significant problems. Before you pack your bag, consider the following:

• Dangers of the Streets: Homelessness exposes you to crime, violence, exploitation, and substance abuse. You are significantly more vulnerable to becoming a victim of theft, assault, and sexual exploitation.
• Lack of Resources: Without money, identification, and a support system, finding food, shelter, and medical care will be incredibly difficult. You may be forced to rely on dangerous or illegal activities to survive.
• Legal Consequences: Running away is illegal in many jurisdictions, and you could face legal penalties or be placed in the foster care system if found by the authorities.
• Educational Setbacks: Leaving home disrupts your education, making it harder to graduate and pursue future opportunities.
• Emotional Toll: The stress and uncertainty of being on your own can lead to anxiety, depression, and other mental health issues. You will likely experience feelings of loneliness, fear, and regret.
• Family Relationships: Running away can severely damage your relationships with your family, making it harder to reconcile in the future.

Exploring Alternative Solutions

Before running away, explore these alternatives:

• Talk to Your Parents: Open and honest communication is often the first step. Try to explain your feelings calmly and respectfully. If you find it difficult to communicate directly, consider writing a letter or asking a neutral third party to mediate.
• Seek Counseling: A therapist or counselor can provide a safe space to discuss your problems and develop coping strategies. They can also help improve communication between you and your family.
• Confide in a Trusted Adult: Talk to a teacher, school counselor, family friend, or religious leader. They can offer support, advice, and guidance.
• Contact Social Services: If you are experiencing abuse or neglect, contact your local child protective services agency. They can investigate the situation and provide necessary interventions.
• Mediation: A trained mediator can help facilitate communication and resolve conflicts between you and your family.
• Temporary Shelter: If you need a temporary escape from your home environment, explore options like staying with a friend or family member, or seeking refuge at a local shelter.

Remember: Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness. There are people who care about you and want to help you find a solution that works for everyone.

If You Still Choose to Run: A Survival Guide

Disclaimer: The following information is provided for safety purposes only. Running away is dangerous, and we strongly advise against it. This section assumes that you have exhausted all other options and made the difficult decision to leave. It is crucial to prioritize your safety and well-being at all times.

Phase 1: Planning and Preparation

Proper planning is crucial to your survival. This phase involves careful consideration of your resources, destination, and potential challenges.

1. Destination: Choose a destination carefully. Consider these factors:
   • Safety: Research crime rates and potential dangers in the area. Avoid areas known for high rates of homelessness or violence.
   • Resources: Look for areas with access to shelters, food banks, and other support services.
   • Transportation: Plan your route and consider the cost of transportation. Can you afford a bus ticket? Do you have a safe place to stay upon arrival?
   • Contacts: Do you know anyone in the area who might be able to offer assistance? Be cautious about relying on strangers, but having a potential contact can be helpful.
2. Money: Save as much money as possible. Even a small amount can make a significant difference. Consider selling unwanted items or doing odd jobs to earn extra cash.
3. Supplies: Gather essential supplies, including:
   • Identification: A driver’s license, passport, or school ID can be helpful for accessing services and proving your identity.
   • Birth Certificate: A copy of your birth certificate can be useful for applying for certain benefits or obtaining identification.
   • Social Security Card: While you should keep this safe and secure, having a copy can be helpful for employment purposes.
   • Medications: If you take any prescription medications, bring enough to last for several weeks. Obtain copies of your prescriptions if possible.
   • Clothing: Pack durable, weather-appropriate clothing. Include layers for warmth and rain gear for protection from the elements.
   • First-Aid Kit: Include bandages, antiseptic wipes, pain relievers, and any personal medications.
   • Hygiene Products: Pack soap, shampoo, toothbrush, toothpaste, and other essential hygiene items.
   • Food: Non-perishable food items like granola bars, canned goods, and dried fruit can provide sustenance in emergencies.
   • Water Bottle: Staying hydrated is crucial.
   • Flashlight: A flashlight can be invaluable for navigating in the dark.
   • Map: A physical map of your destination can be helpful if you don’t have access to a smartphone or GPS.
   • Emergency Contact List: Write down the phone numbers of trusted adults, shelters, and social service agencies.
   • Small Knife or Multi-Tool: Can be useful for various tasks (check legality in your destination).
   • Sleeping Bag or Blanket: Essential for warmth if you end up sleeping outdoors.
4. Plan Your Exit: Choose a time when your parents or guardians are least likely to notice your absence immediately. Leave a note explaining your reasons for leaving, but avoid providing too much detail about your destination. This note is primarily for their peace of mind and to let them know you are (relatively) safe. Try to word it in a way that doesn’t escalate the situation further, focusing on needing time and space.
5. Secure Important Documents (If Possible and Safe): If you can safely and discreetly obtain copies of your birth certificate, social security card, and any medical records, do so. These documents will be essential for accessing services and employment. Do not put yourself in danger to obtain these documents. Your safety is the priority.
6. Digital Security:
   • Privacy Settings: Review and adjust the privacy settings on all your social media accounts. Make sure your location is not publicly visible.
   • Communication: Use secure messaging apps like Signal or WhatsApp for communication. Be cautious about sharing your location or plans online.
   • Device Security: Password-protect your phone and other devices. Enable location tracking in case your device is lost or stolen.

Phase 2: On the Run

This phase focuses on immediate survival and finding resources.

1. Safety First: Your safety is the top priority. Avoid dangerous situations, trust your instincts, and be aware of your surroundings.
2. Find Shelter:
   • Shelters: Contact local homeless shelters or youth shelters. These shelters provide temporary housing, meals, and other support services. Be aware that shelters often have rules and regulations you must follow.
   • Churches and Religious Organizations: Many churches and religious organizations offer assistance to people in need, including food, shelter, and clothing.
   • Safe Places: If you can’t find a shelter, look for safe places to sleep, such as libraries, 24-hour cafes, or bus stations. Avoid sleeping in isolated or unlit areas.
   • Friends/Acquaintances: While it’s best not to rely heavily on this, if you have a friend or acquaintance who is willing to let you stay temporarily, proceed with extreme caution. Ensure you fully trust the person and the environment is safe before accepting their offer. Inform someone you trust about your location and situation.
3. Find Food:
   • Food Banks: Locate local food banks and pantries. These organizations provide free food to people in need.
   • Soup Kitchens: Soup kitchens offer free meals to the homeless and hungry.
   • Dumpster Diving: While not ideal, dumpster diving can be a source of food. Only take food that is properly sealed and appears to be safe. Avoid eating anything that smells bad or is past its expiration date. Be aware of potential legal issues and hygiene concerns. This should be a last resort.
   • Apply for Food Stamps (SNAP): If you are eligible, apply for food stamps (SNAP) to help you purchase groceries. Eligibility requirements vary by state.
4. Find Water:
   • Public Fountains: Look for public drinking fountains or water fountains in parks and other public areas.
   • Restrooms: Many restrooms in public buildings have drinking water available.
   • Bottled Water: If possible, purchase bottled water to ensure a safe and reliable source of hydration.
5. Stay Clean:
   • Public Restrooms: Use public restrooms to wash your hands and face.
   • Shelters: Many shelters offer showers and laundry facilities.
   • Gyms: If you can afford it, a gym membership can provide access to showers and locker rooms.
   • Laundromats: Use laundromats to wash your clothes.
6. Stay Healthy:
   • Medical Care: If you need medical care, seek help from free clinics or hospitals.
   • Mental Health: Prioritize your mental health. Seek counseling or support groups if you are struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health issues.
   • Hygiene: Maintain good hygiene to prevent illness and infection.
   • Nutrition: Eat a balanced diet as much as possible to stay healthy and energized.
7. Find Work:
   • Temporary Agencies: Temporary agencies can help you find short-term employment.
   • Day Labor: Look for day labor jobs, such as construction or landscaping.
   • Online Gigs: Explore online gigs like data entry or freelance writing.
   • Restaurants and Retail: Many restaurants and retail stores hire entry-level employees.
8. Avoid Risky Behavior: Stay away from drugs, alcohol, and other risky behaviors. These activities can impair your judgment and increase your vulnerability to danger.
9. Build a Support Network: Connect with other people who are in similar situations. Building a support network can provide emotional support and practical assistance. Be cautious about who you trust, but don’t isolate yourself completely.
10. Stay Legal: Avoid breaking the law. Even minor offenses can have serious consequences.
11. Keep a Low Profile: Avoid drawing attention to yourself. The less noticeable you are, the safer you will be.
12. Learn Self-Defense: Consider taking a self-defense class to learn how to protect yourself in dangerous situations.
13. Stay Informed: Keep up-to-date on local news and events. Knowing what’s happening in your area can help you avoid potential dangers.

Phase 3: Long-Term Planning

This phase focuses on finding a stable and sustainable living situation.

1. Obtain Identification: If you don’t have identification, work to obtain it. A driver’s license, passport, or state ID card will be essential for finding employment and accessing services.
2. Get an Education: Pursue your education. A high school diploma or GED can significantly improve your job prospects.
3. Find Stable Housing:
   • Transitional Housing: Transitional housing programs provide temporary housing and support services to help people transition to permanent housing.
   • Subsidized Housing: Apply for subsidized housing programs, such as Section 8, which provide rental assistance to low-income individuals and families.
   • Affordable Housing: Look for affordable housing options in your area.
4. Develop Job Skills: Acquire job skills through vocational training programs or apprenticeships.
5. Manage Your Finances: Create a budget and learn how to manage your money effectively.
6. Build Credit: Establish credit by opening a bank account and using a credit card responsibly.
7. Reconnect with Family (If Possible and Safe): If it is safe and you desire to do so, consider reconnecting with your family. This may require time, patience, and professional mediation.

Legal Considerations

Running away is a legal issue in many jurisdictions. The laws vary by state, but generally, running away is considered a status offense, meaning it is illegal only because of the person’s age.

• Age of Majority: The age of majority is the age at which a person is legally considered an adult. In most states, the age of majority is 18.
• Truancy: Running away can also be considered truancy, which is the act of being absent from school without permission.
• Consequences: The consequences of running away can include fines, detention, or placement in the foster care system.
• Emancipation: Emancipation is a legal process that allows a minor to become legally independent of their parents or guardians. Emancipation can be granted if the minor can demonstrate that they are capable of supporting themselves and managing their own affairs.

Resources

Here are some resources that can provide assistance to runaway and homeless youth:

• National Runaway Safeline: 1-800-RUNAWAY (1-800-786-2929) – Provides crisis intervention, referrals, and support services to runaway and homeless youth.
• Covenant House: Provides shelter, food, and other services to homeless youth.
• Youth Shelters: Search online for youth shelters in your area.
• 2-1-1: Dial 2-1-1 to connect with local health and human service programs.
• The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 – Provides crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBTQ youth.
• Childhelp USA: 1-800-422-4453 – Provides crisis intervention and support services to children who have been abused or neglected.

Disclaimer: This article provides general information and should not be considered legal or professional advice. Laws and resources vary by location. Always consult with qualified professionals for specific guidance. The author and publisher are not responsible for any consequences resulting from the use of this information.